The Journey to Jabba's Palace
by Dark Side Luke
Summary: Luke's journey to -- and in -- Jabba's palace. He encounters a frustrating droid, a fork in the road, an annoying Twi'lek and more! All while tying not to suffocate in his robe. Please review!


The Journey to Jabba's by Dark Side Luke

Disclaimer: If I owned Star Wars, I would be a very happy man. As it is though, I own nothing. I own the story! Unless you want to buy it…do you want to buy it?

Summary: It's that time when Luke journeys to Jabba's palace and his little trek when he gets there as well. 

A/N: I like Luke, which is why I make him look so dumb and childish in all my stories. You can only imagine what I do to those I HATE!

Luke Skywalker, Jedi Knight, cursed himself for his stupidity. Why in the name of the Force did he wear black while trekking across the desert?

"Idiot," he muttered, pushing the hood down on his cloak. "Could've brought a canteen of water or something, but noooooo, you had to be the all-powerful Jedi. Damn stupid Jabba…" He trailed off into incoherence. 

For the third or fourth time since he started his walk, he checked his pockets for something to drink. There was a few crumpled credit bills; a piece of chewing gum; a few wires left over from constructing his lightsaber (that had been a while ago), but no water.

He stopped for a brief rest and looked behind him, checking for any sandpeople who might have snuck up behind him. All he saw, however, was Obi-Wan Kenobi's house, a few hundred meters behind him. He cursed again.

What would he do if a sandperson attacked him anyway? He had left his lightsaber with Artoo. He supposed he could levitate a rock and hurl it at his attacker, or maybe push him down with the Force, or maybe even choke him but that was about all. Again he cursed his stupidity. Why didn't he bring a gun? Well, that was easily answered. 

"Because they wouldn't let you in if you were armed," he told himself. He paused in thought. "Why are you talking to yourself, Luke?" He paused again. "You're still talking to yourself." He screwed his eyes shut in frustration. "Stop talking to yourself!" He sighed and continued on.

Once again, he checked his pockets for something to drink.

~*~

Luke leaned against the wall of Jabba's palace. His breath caught in his throat, which was raspy and dry, filled with half the sand between here and Ben's house.

Ben's house or Obi-Wan's? He often thought about this when talking about the old man or his belongings. He still did not think of the house as his own.

He shook off the stupid thought. He should be worrying about Leia, or Han or…Lando or something. It was hard to concentrate when his head felt so light from fatigue.

__

Use the Force, he thought. _Use its healing energies._

Forget that. He'd probably black out or something embarrassing like that.

When he was ready, he stood up as straight as he could, pulled on his hood and stood in front of the door.

It didn't open.

What did open, however, was a small hole and out came a weird droid that consisted of an eye and not much else. He arched an eyebrow in question. This was unexpected.

The droid rattled off in some unknown language. Luke caught a few words: intruder, go, away, freak, but not much else. Luke sighed in resignation. The language barrier was one he had trouble leaping over and landing on his feet successfully.

__

Some analogy, Luke, he thought. 

Again, the droid rattled something off. He caught the word password.

"You need a password?" Luke asked in Basic, not trusting his grip of…whatever language that was.

The droid moved up and down, as if nodding its assent.

Luke tried to think of a password that Jabba might use…and failed miserably. He didn't know Jabba that well and he definitely didn't know what the Hutt might use as a password.

"Um…Jabba?" he asked hopefully. The droid shook its eye and waited for him to try again.

Luke thought again. Damn stupid droid, he thought then immediately suppressed the voice in his head. Jedi were supposed to be even-tempered. He was better at suppressing his rage, but he needed a little more work with that skill.

The droid rambled off something in its off language. Whatever it said, it sounded impatient.

"Uh…Jedi?" Luke asked. Nope. No good. "Purple? Darth Vader? Dagobah? Empire? Rancor? Krayt Dragon?"

He wasn't sure which word did it, as he said them one after the other very quickly, but the droid went back to its little hole and the door slid open.

How…convenient. He stepped inside.

It was dark, very dark. He walked forward, waiting for his eyes to adjust.

He almost didn't see the Gamoreans until he was right on top of them. The pair of guards detached themselves from the shadows and lowered their pikes, barring his path. He concealed his surprise under his hood, hoping they didn't see his eyes bulge out in shock.

What now? Oh, right. The Force. He raised his right hand and gestured to each guard in turn, cutting off their air supply, causing them to back off, and grasping their throats in a vain attempt to open their airways. He would've laughed, but he wasn't sure if that would lead to the Dark Side, or just be rude. 

Even-tempered, you fool. Even-tempered. 

He walked past the wheezing pig guards, trying to piece out the inside of the palace with his light-scorched eyes. Didn't Jabba have lamps installed or something? He squinted into the shadows.

He walked down the shadowed hallway until he came to a three-way fork. Didn't Leia say something about the middle path? Or was it Lando who said something about the left path? Artoo had read-outs of the palace. He said…right? Oh, he couldn't remember.

He stood there for a long while, realizing that time was ticking away and Leia could be in really big trouble. Oh, and Han, yeah…couldn't forget about Han. And Lando. Man, there were so many people to rescue! Although he was sure Lando could take of himself. The droids needed rescuing too…man.

Okay, left, right, center. Um…Uh…

"Hurry, Luke!" he said. "And stop talking to yourself."

After another moment's hesitation, he walked down the center path, still unsure of himself. A dim light shown down a small flight of stairs. Aha! Now he knew where he was. Leia was right after all. He wondered where the other paths led to.

"Probably the bathroom," he said. He cursed again. "And stop talking to yourself!"

He walked down the stairs, nearly tripping over his robe in the process and being blinded by his hood, which kept drooping into his eyes. Halfway down the stairs, a Twi'lek came to meet him, babbling something in his native language. Luke sighed, wishing he spent more time learning new languages instead of…learning new Force skills? No, he couldn't give up those. Could he give up messing with engines and droids? No way! Ah, forget it.

He met the Twi'lek and provided a thought for him with the Force, telling him to take Luke to his master. He hoped the Twi'lek's – was that Bib Fortuna? – master was Jabba and not someone like…Boba Fett or something. 

That would be embarrassing.

The Twi'lek – it _was _Bib Fortuna! – led him to Jabba. 

Score!

~*~

And the rest…is history. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. Please, review!


End file.
